Saturday, July 25, 2009

Road to Redemption

281, that's what the scale said this morning. How does that happen? Probably stress and water retention, but oh well I am sticking with the 294, why be disappointed on the backswing, right? Yesterday I was pretty angry. I don’t think I am less angry today, but I feel like I need to introduce you to my “road to ruin” before you can walk side by side on my “road to redemption”. So, I will be addressing my regular blogs as the Road to Ruin and the Road to Redemption.
My travels to 294 have not been an easy road and the path was not all that straight. What you will come to know about me is that I analyze everything. I analyze you, I analyze situations, and most importantly and strictly of all I analyze myself and my role in everything, even if I do not have a role.
It’s not that I think that I am all that important, I just feel like I have a way of screwing everything up for everyone and screwing things up the worst for myself.
Today has been an overall good day. It was just me, my husband, and my two year old today. My four year old is spending the weekend with her Nana and my sister who lives with me is also there. Just kind of a relaxing day. The baby and I went to the store yesterday to stock up on fruity snacks, so that I could resist temptation of snacking on unhealthy foods.
Everything is just better when everyone cooperates and today was the best. I made turkey chili for dinner with lots of tomatoes and three kinds of beans.
I didn’t do anything though. That I believe is the crux of the true problem. I am terminally inactive. To be honest, it’s not really all that comfortable to move. When you are big and you try to exercise you sweat in places that you could never imagine. To make things worse, I HATE to walk. I am just being honest here. I don’t mind riding the exercise bike or being on an elliptical machine, but I hate the stupid put one foot in front of the other for exercise purposes. It’s ridiculous. What are you supposed to do while you walk? Look at a bird? This has been a really bad excuse of mine for a while. Truthfully, I just don’t want people looking at me. The thought of my neighbor keeping track of my laps of the block as I make them angers me. That sounds ridiculous, but people do that stuff. People count your laps, guess how much you weigh (badly)even though there is no prize involved.
You can ask anyone and I will provide you with a list of names if need be…I do not eat an unreasonable amount of food. People tell me that all the time. I am fat, not because I eat a lot, but because I make poor dietary choices and I don’t do anything.
Anyway, back to ignorant people and their ignorant ways...I was in a restaurant with a friend once, I had the fish platter with cottage cheese and a side salad. I will never forget that order, because as I was getting up from the table to pay for it, some two tooth hoosier with a trucker cap and a greasy salt and pepper beard told his son (who was sitting in front of a triple burger with fries and chili) that he better hurry up and start eating because I was headed his way and it looked like I was still hungry. I was hungry after that, I was so pissed off that I could have taken a bite out of that ignorant uneducated UGLY man.
The goal is to be more active.
(To be continued)

1 comment:

  1. Why dead inside the shell? it's very catchy, but I know there is so much ALIVE inside the shell!! I guess I get expresses the pain. It bothers me though....good luck tomo at the seminar!!!