Saturday, April 9, 2016

Road Blocks

Roadblocks are always there to pop up when you least expect them,  Yesterday, I hit my first on my newest journey.

Part of the process in gearing up for bariatric surgery is that the Dr.'s office has a rep that verifies your insurance coverage.  This was not a concern because I know that it is covered as there are several people in my office who have had it done.  When the call came in on Friday, I was thrilled.  This was quick...all I'll need to do now is make my appointment and start the 3 month countdown.


Apparently the insurance company has instituted a requirement to have 6 months of a medically supervised weight loss program in order to qualify.  This shouldn't have been a big deal to me, but it took the wind right out of my sails.  I spent some time bitching about it until I finally convinced myself that before I knew they could do everything so quickly, I was going to put it off until later in the year anyway.  So, this change in my plan was actually my original plan, which felt like the right plan initially.

I'm kind of proud of myself because all the ingredients were there to complete a recipe for disaster, but instead of spending time in self destructive behavior over my self destructive behavior, I talked myself down and realized that this just brought me back to where I was before the seminar.  It didn't and there was no reason for this to set me back any further than that.
And then...when I have my surgery in the last part of the year, I will be in much better shape and that much closer to reaching my goals.

Speaking of goals...

I accidentally skipped my 500 words yesterday.  It says I'm not supposed to try and make them up, but I will.  I've been so good.  I fell asleep, so it's not like I made a conscious decision not to write them, but this soon in the process it feels like a failure.  If there is anything I need, its to feel like I am succeeding at something. Especially those things that are so intensely personal to me. If I am going to follow through with anything at this sure as heck better be something for which I benefit.  I'm not selfish, I swear, but truthfully, I am a thousand times more likely to finish something that I am doing for someone else than I am to really begin anything that is just for me.

The Color Run is exactly a week away.  Now it's the whole clan.  My 8 year old and my mom are now joining us so that adds a level of difficulty.  Last time I did a 5K with my mom, she told me how much she regretted signing up...the whole time.  Erica has never done anything like this and I usually can not get her to turn off the TV long and walk up to her room let alone get her to walk 3.2 miles.  The adults can do what needs to be done, but somebody has to stay and finish with the kids.  I hope that's not me. I hope everyone finishes.

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