Monday, March 26, 2012

Monday, Monday

I haven't been around much lately.

I haven't been writing here, I haven't been reading here, I haven't been here at all.

It's not because I went off the rails, quit trying, and gained a bunch of weight.  It's because the impact of writing this blog affected an area of my life that is important to me: My Writing.

The responsibility of trying to be here and straight up writing about losing weight, writing about trying to get healthy stole my writing joy.  I didn't write for a all.

It's back's like an addiction.  A need for me to put pen to paper and express how I feel, or just feelings in general, bubbles right underneath the surface, I have to feed that need.  It's a healthy addiction.

I have considered that maybe the strong focus on losing weight sometimes makes me dislike myself. 

Maybe I can't see the forest for the trees due to my laser focus on one particular area of my life.

We all know that you can workout and eat right and do everything right and one day you will reach your goal...but will it fix what got you here in the first place?  I don't believe that everyone has a deep seeded reason they gained weight, but I believe I do.  I believe this because the same struggles I fight with losing weight are the same struggles I have in not reaching ANY goal I set.

I am still here.  I am still fighting.  I am still writing both here and around.  I am not sure right now if my two writing worlds have a relationship they plan to take public.  I am not going anywhere.  This is still a priority to me.  It just can't be THE priority.  It has a place and an implementation, but it has definitely carried unnecessary focus since I lost my job.  The phrase that pays should be "Healthy Body, Healthy Mind." 

1 comment:

  1. Hi Christie,
    I haven't been writing my blog lately either, for a number of reasons. All is more or less well with me. I'm wondering how you are? I hope you are doing lots of the kind of writing that you want to be doing.
    Be well...